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38 Best Christmas Jokes - The only list you'll need.

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Christmas jokes should be part of the holiday cheer. If you want to make your holidays even better, bring out the jokes.

They say that Christmas is the time of giving. Give people the gift of joy with the perfect Christmas jokes that are meant to make anyone burst with laughter.

A normal Christmas celebration can turn into a night filled with bonding, fun, and laughter with the right jokes at the right time. Sure, some jokes may seem a little corny for people's taste, but that's what makes it more fun.

You don't have to go through endless lists of jokes for the holiday because this list of Christmas jokes has all the best ones in it.

Contents

5 Best Christmas jokes

There's nothing better than bonding over the best Christmas jokes after your Christmas dinner. Your favorite holiday should be filled with fun and laughter, that's why we really handpicked the best Christmas jokes for you with this list.

Here are the 5 best Christmas jokes:

1. What do you call cutting down a Christmas tree?

I mean... shopping isn't the only thing we do in preparation for Christmas.

Show Answer

Answer

Christmas chopping!

2. What did Adam say the day before Christmas?

Adam was a witty one, huh?

Show Answer

Answer

It's Christmas, Eve!

3. What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?

Not to be confused with people afraid of closed spaces.

Show Answer

Answer

Claustrophobic

4. What do snowmen have for breakfast? Snowflakes!

Do corns have cornflakes for breakfast?

Show Answer

Answer

Snowflakes!

5. Did you hear that Santa knows karate?

Maybe don't provoke him.

Show Answer

Answer

He has a black belt.

4 dad Christmas jokes

Dad jokes can be cringy, but admit it or not, they're funny. These Christmas dad jokes will leave you in so much disbelief at how dad joke-y they are, that you'll have nothing to do but laugh. That makes it all the more fun during Christmas eve: the holiday cheer with your dad's neverending jokes.

Here are 4 dad Christmas jokes:

6. What did the beaver say to the Christmas Tree?

I hope they become good friends.

Show Answer

Answer

Nice gnawing you!

7. What do you call a snowman with a six pack?

I want to know where he works out.

Show Answer

Answer

An abdominal snowman.

8. What cars do elves drive?

A fast driver, you are.

Show Answer

Answer

A toyYoda

9. Who is Santa's favorite singer?

I heard he's the most famous singer in the North Pole.

Show Answer

Answer

Elf-is Presley

5 christmas jokes for kids

Christmas is the holiday that almost every kid loves. They even say that Christmas is for children. These Christmas jokes for kids will make Christmas even more fun than it already is for the beloved kids.

Here are 5 Christmas jokes for kids:

10. What do snowmen like to do on the weekend?

I think they do that even on weekdays.

Show Answer

Answer

Chill out.

11. What's red and white and falls down chimneys?

Oh, how clumsy of him.

Show Answer

Answer

Santa Klutz!

12. What do you say to Santa when he's taking attendance at school?

Hope you get one!

Show Answer

Answer

Present

13. What do snowmen call their offspring?

They don't cry because they're just chill.

Show Answer

Answer

Chill-dren

14. What are you giving Mom and Dad for Christmas?

Is this a joke if it's reality? It's not like we haven't been doing it for years!

Show Answer

Answer

A list of everything I want!

4 corny christmas jokes

These corny jokes will be so bad that you can't help but laugh. And that's what we want for Christmas: laughter in the air. So, why not try this list of corny Christmas jokes to lighten up the mood even more? They might not hit the right places to make people laugh, but you'll all be having a great time.

Here are 4 corny Christmas jokes:

15. What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees?

They have a different kind of Christmas tree.

Show Answer

Answer

Horn-aments

16. Why couldn’t the skeleton go to the Christmas Party?

He prefers to celebrate at home with no body around.

Show Answer

Answer

Because he had no body to go with!

17. How does Christmas Day end?

I mean... it's not wrong!

Show Answer

Answer

With the letter Y!

18. Why does Santa have elves in his workshop?

They just can't be bothered.

Show Answer

Answer

Because the Seven Dwarfs were busy!

6 bad christmas jokes

Your Christmas jokes don't always have to be a hit. They can miss, and that's alright. That's what makes the joke funny. These bad jokes aren't a guaranteed hit, but they're so bad that they're already too good.

Here are 6 bad Christmas jokes:

19. Who’s Rudolph’s favorite pop star?

And she slays!

Show Answer

Answer

Beyon-sleigh!

20. Why are Christmas trees so fond of the past?

I wonder if they have ever thought of their future.

Show Answer

Answer

Because the presents are beneath them.

21. How is the alphabet different on Christmas from every other day?

It goes ABCDEFGHIJKMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ. Something feels wrong, huh?

Show Answer

Answer

There's Noel!

22. How does a sheep say Merry Christmas?

Another could be Meeee-rry Christmas!

Show Answer

Answer

Fleece Navidad!

23. Which of Santa's reindeer has the worst manners?

Who's going to teach him the right manners?

Show Answer

Answer

RUDE-olph, of course!

24. How did the ornament get addicted to Christmas?

The addiction is very much expected.

Show Answer

Answer

He was hooked on trees his whole life.

5 christmas knock knock jokes

Your list of Christmas jokes just isn't complete if you don't have any knock-knock jokes in there. What makes knock knock jokes so fun is that anyone can relate and understand them. These kinds of jokes are always a hit, whether to our grandparents or to the children.

Here are 5 Christmas knock knock jokes:

25. Knock, knock! Who's there? Noah. Noah who?

It's probably not this joke.

Show Answer

Answer

Noah good Christmas joke?

26. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Doughnut. Doughnut, who?

Now I'm hungry.

Show Answer

Answer

Doughnut open until Christmas!

27. Knock, knock! Who's there? Snow. Snow, who?

Saying this joke is like saying "throw some snow at me". Kidding.

Show Answer

Answer

Snow time to waste. It’s almost Christmas!

28. Knock, knock! Who's there? Dexter. Dexter, who?

But the real question is... who is Dexter?

Show Answer

Answer

Dexter halls with boughs of holly.

29. Knock, knock. I hope Murray's having a great Christmas eve.

I hope Murray's having a great Christmas eve.

Show Answer

Answer

Murray Christmas, one and all!

4 punny christmas jokes

Punny jokes are the best types of jokes because they're so punny! Being punny is a skill and not everyone can come up with the best ones. That's why we've made this list of the best Christmas puns.

Here are 4 punny Christmas jokes:

30. What is Christmas tree's favorite candy?

Makes your mouth smell good, too.

Show Answer

Answer

Ornamints.

31. What's Santa Claus's favorite type of potato chip?

Ba-dum tss. That was forced. But say it like it wasn't.

Show Answer

Answer

Crisp Pringles!

32. What did the pepper say on its holiday card?

Do all the seasonings say this?

Show Answer

Answer

Season's greetings.

33. What kind of Christmas music do elves like?

They blast it all night when "rapping" gifts.

Show Answer

Answer

"Wrap" music

5 stupid christmas jokes

You shouldn't have to be the most intelligent person to get a joke. That's why everyone loves stupid jokes, you don't even have to think too much about them. They're so stupid, they're funny! These stupid Christmas jokes will add a little more cheer to your holiday.

Here are 5 stupid Christmas jokes:

34. What do you get if you cross an iPad with a Christmas tree?

I'd take the iPad on its own, thank you.

Show Answer

Answer

A pineapple!

35. Where do you find reindeer?

I mean... it's the truth.

Show Answer

Answer

It depends on where you leave them!

36. What does the Gingerbread Man use to make his bed?

Remember to use cookie sheets before baking your cookeis. The Gingerbread Man did it right.

Show Answer

Answer

Cookie sheets!

37. What does Santa say at the start of the race? Ready set, Ho! Ho! Ho!

At which Ho do we start running?

Show Answer

Answer

Ready set, Ho! Ho! Ho!

38. What did one snowman say to the other snowman?

I thought snowmen said "I like warm hugs."

Show Answer

Answer

Do you smell carrots?

Downloadable and Printable List of Christmas Jokes

Here is a downloadable and printable jpg/pdf list of Christmas jokes (right-click the image and select Save Image As...):

How to Pick the Best Christmas joke

All jokes are beautiful. That is exactly why picking the right jokes for your Christmas bonding and dinner can be so hard. The right kind of jokes means everything when you want to bring more cheer into the picture. Lucky for you, we've got this handy list of things to consider when you're ready to pick the best Christmas joke. Take these into consideration when picking the jokes for your list, and you're good to go!

Here is how to pick the best Christmas joke:

1. Who's Your Audience?

To pick the best Christmas jokes, you have to know who you're telling the jokes to. Some jokes that are appropriate and right for adults may not be the right jokes for the kids. Some jokes are best told to those who you're closest to. Some jokes may have references that other people will not get. Take your audience into consideration when picking your jokes.

2. How Much Of A Jokester Are You?

A big part of telling a joke is how you deliver it. How much of a jokester are you? Can you deliver jokes that need you to have the right timing? Or are you more of someone who can just say mindless jokes? Take these into consideration because if you choose the jokes that you can't deliver properly, no one would get it.

3. Mix It Up!

Don't just have pure knock-knock jokes. Put in some puns in there. It's important to mix it up so as not to bore your crowd. Other people might enjoy stupid jokes, but other may be looking for jokes that have puns. Make sure that you cater to everyone and put in some for each category.

More Hilarious Jokes to Share or Start a conversation With

Ho ho ho! If you can't stop laughing, don't even try to stop. Keep laughing with our wide variety of jokes that we gathered all for you.

  1. Before Christmas jokes, there are Thanksgiving jokes. Give thanks to everyone and everything by cracking a great joke.
  2. No need to go on a hunt for the best Easter jokes because we've got them for you.
  3. Halloween shouldn't be all about spook, especially if you want to include kids in the fun! These Halloween jokes for kids are the perfect way to ensure that kids will be enjoying their treats.

In Conclusion

Make your Christmas all the more special with our list of Christmas jokesJokes make the world a better place, so always be ready with the best ones. If Santa ho ho hos his way, you should ha ha ha your way into people's lives this Christmas with the best Christmas jokes in the world.

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